Before I got married, I can’t tell you how many people told me not to get married. (…After writing that, I realize that many of you may be thinking “jeez, maybe you made a mistake if that many people thought it was a bad idea!” But no.) These people were often strangers or acquaintances. People told me not to get married before I even met my husband.
I am completely amazed at how many people feel that marriage is so terrible that they would tell another person not to get married. I am so sad for those people because they must be/have been so miserable. I really hope that I never get to the point that I feel that the entire institution of marriage is a bad idea. Because it’s not. It is a beautiful thing, to vow to stick with someone forever and to work together through this difficult life.
Marriage can be hard, but I hope that you will never regret getting married. I feel that telling another person to avoid marriage shows that you have regrets about your own choices. Some people feel that they would have been better off single. If you feel that way, don’t scare someone else into thinking that they will feel the same way after a few years of being married. You don’t know!
Listen.. your experiences, whether good or bad, are not everyone’s experiences. Don’t bash marriage; work on your own marriage at home, rather than telling someone else that it is a bad idea! Don’t tell everyone that they need to get married either. If you are in a healthy relationship, I am so happy for you. Just remember that not every couple is as happy as you, some people aren’t ready for marriage, some people weren’t meant for long term relationships at all, and your pressure could lead to a person entering an unhappy marriage!
These comments about never getting married actually never really got to me. I was mostly confused by them. (I can see someone else being affected by these comments though!) I have always wanted to get married. I’m the kind of person who functions better with a leader to follow (and someone who corrects me when my ditzyness gets in the way of completing everyday tasks on my own). I have parents who have an amazing relationship. They never fight, they’re loving, and they are a great example. On top of that, Mr. Rockefeller and I are both Christians. We believe in marriage. We believe that God brings people together for a reason. We see keeping a marriage alive as our responsibility to each other and to God. Those comments were easy for me to brush off! That being said, we also believe that not everyone is meant to get married. The Bible tells us that it is better to stay single, if possible, so that one can focus on better serving God! So I hope that we never pressure anyone to get married, based solely on our own experiences (it’s going to be hard!).
Marriage is a huge commitment. Think about whether you are the type of person who is meant to marry or not before making it. If you decide to get married, remember that not everyone shares your experiences. Don’t tell everyone that they should get married because of how happy it makes you and don’t tell people that they should not get married because you are struggling to love your husband or wife. Help people embrace where God has placed them and where His plan is taking them, whether it makes any sense based on your personal experiences or not!!
Featured image from Chive.com.